being that i am depressive by nature, maybe my attitude should be to just try to get some kind of decent holding pattern going and just sort of sit back and observe life and not try to get hung up on accomplishing anything or being somebody or anything. my stomach knots up with the anxiety that this admission brings, "settling for mediocrity," in one's one shot at life. pissing it away. or just surviving. but i guess that beats going nuts, eating your insides out and killing yourself.

so how do you spend time?